Why I've Been Quiet: Living with Sleep Apnea Fatigue
My Sleep Apnea Diagnosis
I wanted to check in because I know I’ve been a bit quiet on here and on my socials. I’ve got a million and one different ideas for posts floating round in my head but getting them onto the screen is another matter. The truth is, yesterday I was diagnosed with severe obstructive sleep apnea. Living with sleep apnea fatigue has affected everything from my blog to my everyday life. I have always slept a lot, even in the daytime. I fall asleep on the bus, in college class, and I can’t remember the last time I went to the cinema without dozing off, no matter how much I was looking forward to seeing the film! My ex always said I used to stop breathing in the night, and anyone who has slept anywhere near me will vouch for the fact that I snore like a bear! I’ve often wondered if I have sleep apnea, my dad had it and it can be hereditary. He says his went away when he lost a lot of weight. I have recently lost a stone and a half, but my sleep is worse than ever. This year it has really taken its toll on me and stopped me from doing things I wanted to do, I knew I couldn’t carry on like this. I had an appointment with the sleep clinic a few months ago, but ironically I overslept and missed the appointment. A couple of days ago a got a call to go in and collect the equipment.
The Process: Being Assessed and Diagnosed
I collected the equipment and was told to wear it for a night, then take it back the next morning. It was just a small bag, with a contraption that fastens round the chest snugly, connected to a rubber little sleeve thing for your finger, and tubes that go up your nostrils, and over your ears. I fasted it to my face but I woke up numerous times in the night and it had fallen out. I was worried they wouldn’t be able to get enough data from it but I returned it anyway along with a brief questionnaire. I got a phone call the same day! The doctor said that although the equipment had fallen out, the results were conclusive, I have severe sleep apnea which means I am in the range of people who wake up more than 30 times every hour. I had already been 99% sure that I have sleep apnea, but as the doctor was explaining things, a lot became clear, this is one of the reasons everything feels like such hard work. No matter how many hours sleep I get, it’s not restful, deep sleep. I have literally been trying to run on empty, which explains why sleep apnea fatigue has made even the smallest tasks feel like climbing a mountain.
The Treatment: Darth Vader Machine!
Although my diagnosis made sense of things, it’s never nice finding out that there’s yet another thing ‘wrong’ with you. At least with sleep apnea fatigue, there’s a clear treatment: CPAP. The doc told me that I would be on the waiting list for a CPAP machine for 4-5 months. CPAP stands for Continuous Positive Airway Pressure. The machine works by blowing air through a mask into your nose or mouth. A girl from college has one and she calls it a Darth Vader machine, I assume from the noise it makes?! I can’t imagine it’s gonna be very sexy, but being real, nobody except Ziggy is gonna see me in it! I’m also going to have to go in to be fitted for a mask and watch a presentation on how to use the machine.
My Hopes: Goodbye to Sleep Apnea Fatigue!
The doc talked about how many people say the CPAP gives them a completely new lease of life. As with any treatment there are no guarantees, but if it helps reduce my sleep apnea fatigue, it will change everything. I’m sure people think I’m just being a flake sometimes when I sleep a lot in the day or complain about how tired I am. I hope people might be a bit more understanding now. There have been so many occassions lately where people have let me down on days out etc. I know sometimes these things are unavoidable, but sometimes they’re not. I don’t think people realise how it feels when you’re absolutely exhausted, make plans, and then get let down. It’s like I’ve drawn on limited supplies of energy for nothing, and then I’m wiped out for the next day or two.
My Worries for the Future
Before I was diagnosed I had no idea about the serious health risks of sleep apnea. Apparently it can shorten your life by a few years, and cause high blood pressure, strokes and increased risk of heart disease. I’ve had such a major overhaul of my lifestyle in the last couple of years, I don’t drink, I eat healthily, I’m losing weight, I’m doing as much as I could possibly do to protect my health. I’ve got a holiday coming up with a lot of travelling and activities, but I’ve coped up until now. I’m also worried about my workload when I start uni, and I’ve just started in paid work, as well as my volunteering. I’m praying that the CPAP works brilliantly for me, and I can manage all the things I want to do. I feel like I’ve made some really good personal achievements over the last couple of years, and who knows, with a few weeks good sleep I might be unstoppable!
So yeah, at least now I know why I’ve been so tired, severe sleep apnea fatigue, and hopefully treatment will make all the difference. In the meantime, I’ll keep showing up when I can, even if that means being a little quieter. If you haven’t already, you can read more about my story here.
You can learn more about sleep apnea here
Thanks for sticking with me 